It's so hard to be nice to people. Have you ever noticed that? Not that it takes a lot, it just takes effort. Being mean doesn't take that much time or effort or much of anything really, but one must go out of their way to make sure that they are especially nice to that one other particular person. And lord knows, if you're not nice to them, it will surely come round and bite you in the butt later in life. You know... Like the nerd that grows up to be the CEO of the company that the football jock in high school wants to apply to?
I feel like I'm always waiting. Waiting for something that I can only hope will come. Something that I know is there, but I can't see it. I don't know when it will come. I don't know how and by what means. Hell, I don't even know what it is. I just hope I live long enough for it to happen. And that it happens to me.
Loneliness is not something anyone brags about. It's not what you take pictures of and show off at your next home video night. It's what you feel when you're walking down the street full of people you don't know. Or it's when you go your entire day without having a meaningful conversation with someone. It's when you come home and your friends don't talk to you. And it's what you feel when you're sitting on a couch at 1:30 in the morning, talking to your computer in the dark. It's what you feel when you're writing a blog about what it feels like.
And it sucks.
oh dear. i wish i could be there for you!
ReplyDelete*HUG*
I will visit soon. I promise. I know time is pesky and unyielding but everything happens for a reason. If you want something to happen make it happen. If you don't want to be nice flick everyone off for once. Don't let loneliness bring you down. Fight it. Make it your enemy. I've been that kid before. Make loneliness your bitch and show it who's boss.